February 26th is Pink Shirt Day. Once again we ask our kids to wear Pink in solidarity of their brothers and sisters, classmates and friends who might be victims of a bully. Once again we also should take the time to ask if our societies answer to bullying is working….
Honestly, I don’t know. I think our society is more aware of those in our midst who do suffer. But I don’t know if we are necessarily saving kids or people from the torment. I don’t know if we are making more tolerant people….the media would say no sadly.
Direction and education are key and I am glad to see the CKNW Orphans Fund tackling this issue head on. The proceeds from their awareness campaigns goes to fund various organizations that focus on awareness and education. These include the Boys and Girls Club of BC, Big Brothers and Sisters and many more. To date, over $650,000 has been raised for anti-bullying programs– and the goal for 2014’s Pink Shirt Day campaign is to raise $300,000!
To support the fund you can purchase official Pink Shirt Day t-shirts. You can purchase shirts online at PinkShirtDay.ca or in stores at London Drugs.
Pink Shirt Day asks us to ‘make some’ noise’ about saying no to bullying, but first I would sit the kids down and ask them really and truly do they understand what a bully is and what bullying behavior is? I was really lucky last year to have met Molly Burke prior to the We Day event in Vancouver. Her story of enduring blindness AND cruel tormentors broke my heart and horrified me. What also boggled me was her stories about people approaching her after speaking about JUST realizing they had themselves been bullied. It had never occurred to those people that their actions against others was tantamount to bullying. I am sure they all proudly wore their pink shirts on the day too.
Who picks on a blind person? But then I think of shows like ‘Mean Girls’ and ‘Pretty Little Liars.’ Our world glorifies cruelty. Our media and pop culture teach that popularity equals meanness. We seem to be still teaching kids that the ‘cool’ kids are also ‘cruel’ kids.
The noisy messages of the media that fills our youths heads drowns out the positive messages of things like Pink Shirt Day. The day may be preaching to the choir in that the message is not reaching those who may or may not currently act like bullies themselves.
We have been struggling with this a bit on the home front. My son has been getting into conflicts with another boy at school, to the point that the boys parents were contacting the principal and her us. The more I talked to my son the more it seemed that everything this boy said or did annoyed him and caused him to react in a negative manner. I have pointed out over and over that everyone is free to live their lives their way unless it is detrimental to others. Therefore unless this boy actually DID something…to just back off. I do not know who is truly innocent or guilty in this issue, but I can imagine that the boys family were looking at my son as a bully no matter what the boy had said or done to cause my son to react. Plain and simple. Yet my son did not and I could see that it was a lot more complicated than that too. The scenario does not fit into the typical stories the schools tell kids about bullying and so my son would not and could see how that might be.
Is my son a bully? I don’t think so. Not based on the evidence that has been presented to me…but could he be thought of as one? Absolutely. Could he become one? I hope not.
The one thing I have learned from parenting is that when you get into the school age years, talk from an adult means NOTHING to a child. We are all just spouting hot air to them. Who do they listen to? Each other.
Pink Shirt Day is important as long as its voice stays with the kids so that children can share and speak to each other…..that is how I think we can finally end all these sad stories that keep showing up on our evening news.
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