Apart from sucking at parenting…we do actually try and we do actually try to have some sort of style behind our actions….or excuses…whatever you want to call it.
One of our beliefs is that if you are casual and don’t over react to things..then they tend to be not a big deal for your kids….I really can’t say how successful this is….one of our things is we have never made candy a ‘special’ reward…..it isn’t a treat….it just is something you can get in moderation.
This worked great for Caity. Adam not so much, as he spent his early years being fed chocolate pudding by his doting grandparents at any opportunity they had. His sweet tooth is unsurpassed.
But Caitlyn is great…she will happily chose between candy OR yogurt OR veggies without seeing any real difference in the ‘quality.’ This for us is great.
We have taken this approach with the human body too. We are a pretty casual ‘nudie’ family. They see both of us naked, and the bathroom seem to be the central meeting place to discuss important issues for the Family Crunch.
We have used a mix of the real names for all the parts and made up names for the toilet humour that they incite.
Penis and Vagina are seen and played with and laughed at on a daily basis.
This was cute when they were two.
This is not so cute at 6 and 8.
Neither are the questions about what said body parts do and feel like under certain circumstances…..lots that cause us to throw our hands over our ears and start yelling LALALALALALALALALA!!!
The ‘when I think of cute girls, my weiner does this.’ or the even more disturbing ‘But Mom it feels good to ride Elmo.’ – Really don’t ask for ANY detail on that last one.
yah….now don’t get me wrong….I don’t think my kids are over sexualized for their age….true they have seen to much on film and television….but they still scream when someone just KISSES on tv….so, you know, phew. And they are very innocent about all of this anatomical stuff.
I think we are riding that balance between keeping them informed enough for their age and not freaking them out or giving them misconceptions or weird hang ups. That will all come out years later when they have blogs of their own.
Needless to say, I find it harder and harder to be oh so casual about it all. More and more are the discussions about what is private and what we can share or see or really don’t need to see or share. In between the hoots and shrieks of laughter because THE BABY IS NAKED!!!
Kristina says
Great post. I guess naked time will have to be restricted in the master bedroom. Kids ask a lot of questions and they’re so cute doing it!
Jodi @ Rants n' Rascals says
I was just talking to Monkee Mama about this very topic. I am going through this with Trace and Jake right as they both seem to think toilet talk and body parts should be the topic of discussion anytime… meanwhile jake is like 11 and trace is 4 and we are trying to set boundaries while I too go “lalalala” with my ears covered lol.
Great post hun!
Crunchy Carpets says
Yeah real happy with the comfort about their bodies and no real hangups BUT also..WHOA!!!!
Tanya says
My seven year old is super sensitive about daddy seeing mommy naked. We obviously find this hilarious because he’s seen me more naked than anyone – but I don’t want to tell her that. I want her to keep thinking that boys don’t see girls naked…just for a little while longer 🙂