Last night the kids and I (and Nana) decided to head over to Queen Elizabeth park so we could sneak a view of the end of game fireworks at Nat Bailey. The kids were fully loaded with newly procured snacks and we had a couple of blankets to settle one. The rain did indeed hold off until they were done.
However, the kids were totally hyper and were leaping around in the dark and being very silly. Especially our dear son, Adam.
As the threw his long and loose body to the ground between myself and my mom. She commented that she found him (the male teenage beast) to be quite alien to her. I don’t know if it is just OUR teenage boy or if others are like this too. They do give off a strange energy.
Our boy has caused us a fair bit of stress and upsets since entering teenagehood. It has been a bumpy journey so far. What hasn’t changed, is how much we love him and how much he seems to love us too.
The other night, I had settled into bed after giving up trying to get the rest of the family to do so first. My son, clad only in his boxers loped into the room and flung himself down on the bed beside me. He actually does this a lot. Well, they all do. Me going to bed seems to be the signal for the kids to all come and ‘hang with mom.’ This time it was just him.
As usual his ‘sharing’ seemed fairly nonsensical and not earth shattering either – mostly songs (GOD I HATE HIS MUSIC) and weird things he had found on YouTube and ‘interesting’ facts he had learned that day. Despite the subject matter, I enjoy these moments. His unselfconscious intimacy with his mom feels like such a blessing. You can feel the energy fizzing of him. His life force. His potential. All that life packed into that rangy gangly oblivious body. And the fact that he enjoys giving me a small glimpse into his world is something to be valued and be glad for.
Growing up, there was only myself and my mom for the majority of the time. The one thing that always got us through the rough times was humour. My mom and I have always enjoyed laughing together. The ability to laugh together has remained important to me. My husband and I have a similar sense of humour and we love making each other laugh. This has continued as we grew from two to five. I love seeing and feeling joy and silliness surround me in those that I love. I feel so blessed that my kids all enjoy being together as a family, even as Adam vanishes more and more into his teenage world. He comes back to me and that feels so so important.
So absolutely, we all fight. We all squabble. And it truly hurts my heart when I feel their upset and rage directed at each other. When we fight with him or his siblings, my heart aches at the chasm those disagreements cause and I want to rush up and just hold my children close to me and never let go.
One evening, we all found ourselves in the bathroom at the same time. It seems to be a fairly common place for our family to gather – I don’t know why. Adam was in the shower at the time, putting in his two cents from behind the curtain, and Caity looks at me and asks “Do you think other families do this?” Who knows. This is our thing. Other families have their thing.
I will happily own our weird ‘things’ and enjoy the love and the laughter every single moment I get.