Sometimes at home, things just seem to get out of control. You’re dashing to get out of the door, the kids are screaming in the basement, and your partner has stalked off in a temper. Of course, it’s not like that all of the time, but things often don’t go as smoothly as they might. Have you ever wondered what you can do to create a stronger family atmosphere in your home? Well, it takes a bit of work, but there are lots of things you can do to make your family closer.
With everybody coming in and out at different times, it’s often very difficult to get everyone to sit down together at a meal. However, this is the single biggest thing you can do to strengthen family relationships. The kitchen should be the centrepiece of your home, somewhere you can come together as a family, talk about what’s been going on, and share happy thoughts. Of course, you have to take a realistic approach to this – if you make it a hard and fast rule that you all have to be together at 6 o’clock for dinner each day, then it just won’t work. First, there will always be reasons – and good reasons – why people can’t be there. Second, it will become an obligation rather than something you all enjoy. Instead, get everyone to agree that you will have supper together three times a week, and all agree at the beginning of the week which days those will be. This way, everyone will be there because they want to be there, not because they had been told they have to show up.
Next, try to build family traditions. These don’t have to be big ones, but they have to be something that brings the family together. For example, you could play Scrabble together one night every week, or go for a bike ride in the park together on Sundays. You could even build lists of things you like to do together, and then do one of these each week. You can have longer-term traditions as well, such as watching It’s a Wonderful Life together at Christmas. Whatever it is that you decide to do, make sure you do it consistently and that it becomes something that people look forward to.
Now, let’s talk about walking off in a temper. Even in the most perfect relationship, there are always going to be conflicts – it’s a natural part of being together. However, your kids may not understand this, and there is nothing more calculated to make them hate being with the family than you and your partner arguing all the time. Go somewhere quiet when you need to have a heated discussion about something, and even arrange a signal you can use to tell each other it’s time to take it somewhere else.
Finally, encourage good manners. This isn’t about everyone being perfect, but good manners show that you have respect for the other person. If you do this, you are going to have less arguments because family members aren’t going to offend each other, and will find it more natural to keep on good terms.
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