Unless my mood changes considerably, this blog will start to get very tedious…..I apologize in advance.
It has held me back from posting, because it is becoming the preggo moms version of the whiny teenage diary writing…”why doesn’t he notice meeeee”. But with….”why does this diabetes thing suck sooo muuuuch” instead. Or “why can’t I sleeeeeeep” or “why can’t my kids sleeeeep”
You get the picture.
My mood has been fairly dark recently.
Irritating events on top of irritating events are making me a very cranky woman these days. My tolerance for perceived stupidity is at an all time low.
I am not in the forgiving mood either.
I have LOADS of stuff to do around the house and instead would rather go hide with a goo book. I did that for most of mothers day (I would rather NOT explain why) and part of yesterday too.
I am not depressed…just feeling totally defeated by the forces around me. And angry about it all too.
And I KNOW that there are folks out there with WAY bigger issues than me…AND that I need to look at the bright side of things and the good…but ..well, you know.
For the diabetes thing….Well my readings weren’t that great the first week, BUT I was more curious about what readings I would get on food that I normally eat rather than going cold turkey on adopting their diet plan.
This week so far..since yesterday AM anyway, the readings are better..because I am harshly sticking to their plan and food choices.
THAT hopefully should shut em up.
I have only been twice to the clinic and their chaotic frenetic pace and lack of listening skills are already pissing me off. And it isn’t just me…the other GD ladies have the same expression on their faces as me and are usually saying as little as possible to the nurses, doctors and dietitians there too.
We are not children. We are hormonal, hungry preggo women. Denying us our fave foods this late into pregnancy probably breaks some part of the Geneva Convention…of that I am sure.
Being surprised that my baby is not a monster size, just because, in your eyes, I am is also being annoying.
This girl is measuring just right for her due date thank you very much. Now piss off.
I am supposed to walk or exercise for ten minutes after every meal….a great idea, but I find walking quite painful these days. My tummy tightens up and it gets hard to breathe.
I had this with pretty much with all my pregnancies.
It was WAY worse with little Scott, I could barely walk.
I find I have to do all activity in little bursts. So chill the frak out Diabetes People!
Saturday we had glorious weather and so we did an impromtue yard sale. It was pretty slow but we did get rid of some stuff and made about $50 total. Adam rocked…he hauled out a wack of old toys and was QUITE the salesman.
Today I really really need to tackle the pile of christmas wrap sitting in a corner. However, this entails hauling out loads of stuff from the under the stairs closet to sort out THAT mess and that has been stopping me.
Not today….gotta do it.
It will make me feel better..too see that corner again.
I have been on a big clear out jag..the garbage bags are being put to very good use these days….I just gotta declutter.
On Mothers Day I received some lovely hand made gifts from my kids…Adam had a made a photo fridge magnet and done a little essay about his mom and what she likes…fancy restaurants and penguin pj’s, apparently. Caity had painted a very modern and pink painting on canvas for me.
Bless em.
The child inside me is trying to currently kick her way through my cervix. Bless her.
Okay…..must have snack….lack of food making me cranky.
Shannon says
Oooh lady I know how you feel! Everyone in the medical profession assumed my 10 pound 12 ounce son was so big because of my diabetes (juvenile, not gestational) even though my first baby was two pounds smaller and my diabetes wasn’t as well controlled in that pregnancy. I was super careful and my baby was just destined to be big! Back off doctors! Plus, my endocrinologist compared me to a Clydesdale at one of my appointments. Awesome. Hang in there!
Shannons last blog post..Crazy: The Second Generation
patois says
So sorry for the torture you’re being subjected to. Hang tough!
patoiss last blog post..You’re Not Fooling Anyone, American Express