I have been wondering about this for a bit.
When I first started blogging..on blogspot…I tended to use my blog like a journal…a private journal that total strangers..and family read.
It sort of pissed of my husband.
It also made me think..and come back to blogging with a new approach.
Censored? Maybe.
Careful? Slightly more so.
But I have still shared the ups and downs of my life and those around me with the blogging world.
But not as much as some other bloggers do.
I read blogs about people sharing potential or actual life threatening illnesses that are either affecting them or their loved one’s.
I read blogs where people share their pre or post partum agonies..both physical and mental.
I see the outpourings of comments and support that these heartfelt posts receive.
And weirdly the other day…I will freely admit this….after reading about a person who thought they MIGHT have cancer and then didn’t and saw the HUGE response this person got on their blog and on others AND on twitter, etc…instead of feeling for this person…I felt a tinge of jealousy.
Why?
Well really, because at the beginning of last year…after a weird episode the doctors thought my symptoms resembled a weird cancer.
I was sent for a bunch of tests and was a tad concerned..but waited to see and it was all clear so that was that.
I realized though..I didn’t make a big deal about it here or anywhere else. I downplayed it.
down·play Audio Help /?da?n?ple?/ Pronunciation Key – Show Spelled Pronunciation[doun-pley] Pronunciation Key – Show IPA Pronunciation
–verb (used with object)
to treat or speak of (something) so as to reduce emphasis on its importance, value, strength, etc.: The press has downplayed the president’s role in the negotiations.
[Origin: 1950–55; down1 + play, from v. phrase play down]
Dictionary.com Unabridged (v 1.1)
Based on the Random House Unabridged Dictionary, © Random House, Inc. 2006.
Same as my rough births, pre and post partum depressions and same as my ongoing grieving.
I love the support I get..but I tend to not be able to write big full blown essays on it all.
If I had worded my posts differently…all of my sad posts really…I think my comment numbers would be way huger than they are. Not that I am counting…but you do notice these things right?
Not to say that these people’s trials are less or bad or anything…and they were certainly NOT out to gain readership (I hope)….it was just how they saw their problem and how they CHOSE TO WRITE about it on their blog.
They approach in a purely writing style view…was and is different from mine.
Some people write HUGE deep and amazing essays.
I tend to not think like that nor have the time or energy to write like that.
It comes out in short quick bursts of ‘inspiration’ and I get it out and move on.
OTHER writers take time with their posts…think them out..they are all carefully crafted essays.
Better writers and all that.
But what bothers me..or worries me is that while all of us at some point may use our blogs as a platform to get support or help or something…..we may not get it if our blogs or our writing are not quite up to snuff.
I worry about those out there who play their cards closer to their chests than others might not get the support they need because they are not putting it all out there.
I also feel that these sort of posts or blogs that no doubt DO drive up traffic to sites….are feeding into our ambulance chaser/paparazzi mentality…we do seem to enjoy the misfortune of others.
Twitter tends to fill up with links to these sort of stories…and the compassion is there, no doubt….but misery or mockery do seem to be the big attention grabbers on the internetz.
Agree?
Disagree?
It IS a bit worrisome when our LIFE is measured by traffic numbers on blogs.
Bonnie Sayers (autismfamily) says
Nice thought out post. I just started blogging since the site I write at – http://www.bellonline.com does not support comments and I felt like I was missing out on something.
Now it is hard to keep up with these award things and what to write about and try to find others to read me.
Nice to know I am not the only one thinking along the same lines.
Bonnie Sayers (autismfamily)s last blog post..Planning Ahead
thordora says
It’s pretty hard to support someone who we don’t know needs support. It’s the nature of the beast. I’ve been going through stuff, wrote about it, and had fantastic support. Now that I’m unable to talk about it, not the same level. It’s expected.
Plus frankly, some people have a LOT more time to run around commenting et al than I do. And I wonder about the oodles of comments-I wouldn’t want 200 from commenters I’m not familiar with-I prefer the people who are always reading.
We can always turn all of this into some weird popularity/traffic thing, but I’ve conciously refused to do that anymore. It’s the same as with RL friends-if they don’t tell me things, I can’t help them and I’m not going to spend a lot of energy trying to determine IF something is wrong, and will be as supportive as always.
thordoras last blog post..Something else I’m loving
CrAzY Working Mom says
Unfortunately there are lots of things I’d love to blog about that make me angry or hurt but because my blog is not anonymous and many of my family members read I can’t…it does suck sometimes.
But, the friends (you included) that I have made along this path far outweigh any anonymity (did I spell that right?) that I might consider for the above reason.
I think that our personalities shine through our blogs and that you’re just not the type of person to pour your heart out for sympathy. We all know you went through a tough time and sometimes (as in my case) it’s hard for us to comment because I’ve not experienced what you have. I felt that if I came over and commented too much that it might even hurt worse for you because I was pregnant as you were grieving.
Soooooo…I don’t know if what I said makes any sense or not but, I just seem to be rambling!
CrAzY Working Moms last blog post..Thursday Thirteen – Packed and Ready
ImPerceptible says
I don’t know. I’m mostly anonymous and I can write about whatever I want whenever I want. I like that and that’s the whole reason I blog. Except for MyBlogLog I don’t keep stats anymore. When I started worrying about who and how many it wasn’t fun anymore.
I had quite a few more readers when I spent more time visiting other blogs and leaving a lot of comments but they were just numbers. Everyone that comes to my blog now is someone that is there because they want to know about me (Or look at my picture of the spanking granny!:) and I want to know about them. I enjoy every comment I get because it’s from someone that actually reads my posts and they aren’t there for publicity.
One thing I figured out is support doesn’t come from how many comments you have. It comes from the one person that understand how you feel. The rest is just padding for your ego.
ImPerceptibles last blog post..Rock on, Jesus!
Christina says
I think it’s the problem of the online environment. It’s hard to figure out if something is wrong with someone unless they come right out and declare it. We can’t see the mood, the person’s activity, etc.
I finally gave in and blogged about my depression because it was eating me alive and I needed to get it out to explain why my writing was kinda sucky lately. There’s actually a lot more going on, but there are certain things I can’t blog about because of relatives reading my blog.
Christinas last blog post..(Some) Government Agencies Suck
QuiltNut says
i do agree. if my blog was more anonymous, i would be more open about things that are happening in my life. but with friends and family reading my blog, i don’t feel comfortable doing that