I don’t think so.
So yes, today would have been my due date.
CH thought it was the 15th so he didn’t clue into why people were calling us.
And yes..the kind calls from loving family were appreciated.
But I was feeling okay today. It was a lovely sunny day. I didn’t get any alone time because Caity cried about going to school so I kept her home. Adam had a little open house and so we got to see all his school work. I even put the new sheets on the bed.
CH and I have been more focused on him not currently having a ‘real’ job at the moment and where our next income will come from.
That and working on our list and prepping for our wee holiday.
I AM sad about Scott. But I don’t want to make myself worse.
I could open up the memory box and look at the photos of us. Shellshocked bundles of misery taking turns holding his little body. I could touch the plaster cast of his feet. I could cry …again.
But I don’t want to.
I don’t WANT to be sad.
It is hard to be sad when CH left the tv on with MOTHRA on!
I can hear really weird Japanese singing in the background right now.
I don’t want to be sad.
Everyone is different. Just because you aren’t sad on a significant date doesn’t mean that you are in denial. It isn’t like you have had no emotion or grieving.
Honestly? Only time will tell if you are in denial. Know what the signs are and just keep an eye out.
Otherwise? Just enjoy what you can out of life. Don’t feel bad for happiness (Though I know it’s tempting.)
You are an inspiration girl!
Awww Crunchy….. I really have no words. Big hugs to you though – you are one strong girl!
Crunchy – when pain and love seem fused together you do what you can but I know you ae getting stronger and I am so proud of you.
I’m so sorry.