Having been a ‘PR friendly’ blogger over the years, I have used my platform to promote and support various issues and charities. One I won’t be promoting anymore is Pink Shirt Day.
My youngest is in grade one and my oldest is in grade 8. Over the years’ we have dealt with various dramas at school. We have had words with kids and words with teachers and sat in the principal’s office to ensure we got all sides of the stories. We have been thankful so far that nothing amounted to what can be defined as bullying and any issues so far have been nipped in the bud. We have many years of schooling to survive before I can say we are safe but what I can say is that so far the majority of the issues have been dealt with in a positive manner thanks to my kids character and myself and not due to the school administration.
Every year children and adults show their support and solidarity by wearing pink shirts. Every year we add to the list of children and teens who have either taken their own lives or come close thanks to the horrific abuses they have received in real life and online. The theme for each sad story always seems to be that not enough action was taken by the authorities and adults surrounding those kids. Until it was too late.
Let’s add to that the stories of long wait lists or no help at all for parents struggling for support for children with mental health issues, social, and learning disorders.
One day of wearing pink is not helping. “Awareness” is not helping. I have a feeling that the before Pink Day stats and after are much the same.
The concept of awareness as help has been exacerbated by social media where feeds are clogged with ‘sharing for support’ has made curing cancer as easy as liking a Facebook page.
Liking a page is free, so anyone can feel good about saving the world from their couch. On the other end of the spectrum, we have people spending $8500 on TED Conferences, in which they listen sagely to people who have BIG ideas about saving the world and go to bed feeling they have accomplished something.
But what did it do? What did they DO other than listen? What do we do other than wear a pink shirt?
If your bully is sitting beside you at the school assembly wearing a pink shirt, does that mean they will stop bullying you?
In my opinion, the ‘awareness’ has just muddied the waters. A couple of years ago my middle daughter was having an issue with a group of girls at school. It was petty nastiness online and off. When the counselor at school asked her if she was being bullied, my daughter said no. And she was correct…however later at another meeting with the school the basically told her SHE was wrong in HER accusations of bullying. What my daughter learned was that the school would only ever hear what they wanted to hear and that SHE was in the wrong for trying to stand up for herself and what she believed in. It was a mess of he said she said and not once was I or my daughter convinced that the school was trying to do what was right and instead was doing what was easiest for them.
I get that schools hands are tied by red tape and rules and regulations but I also think that not enough is being done to change those rules and to build a system that goes beyond awareness and actually supports and STOPS chronic bullying.
Suffice it to say my daughter told ME why she was not wearing pink on pink shirt day before I said anything about my own opinion on the matter. So if an 11 year old can see that the concept has gone off the rails, then more has to be done than a feel good pink day.
We need a total cultural shift that starts before kindergarten and ensures we don’t have stories like gamergate and so on plaguing people into their adult lives.
Instead, I will rant on my little read and now non brand popular blog about my own opinions on these issues and hope nothing bad ever happens to my kids.
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